


Marilyn

by wandering_gypsy_feet



Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms, The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alexandria Safe-Zone (Walking Dead), F/M, Merle Dixon Lives, matchmaker merle
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-09
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-14 03:35:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29785869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wandering_gypsy_feet/pseuds/wandering_gypsy_feet
Summary: Merle Dixon cannot understand why the hell Beth and Daryl aren't taking advantage of their newfound safety in the Alexandria Safe Zone to hash some things out.So he's taking matters into his own hands.First up, the faking dating trope.
Relationships: Daryl Dixon/Beth Greene
Comments: 33
Kudos: 80





	Marilyn

**Author's Note:**

> OKAY okay OKAY okay
> 
> when i saw the matchmaker merle prompt, my first thought was the prison, of course
> 
> but then i galaxy brained at the idea of merle in alexandria
> 
> so here we are in an alternate world where michonne saved merle and merle helped out michonne and merle saved beth and then they all go to alexandria together because
> 
> merle. in alexandria. IMAGINE.
> 
> also i have a tradition of posting on my birthday and when i wrapped this up i was like 'happy birthday to me' so plz enjoy this indulgent nonsense

In Beth Greene’s not-so-humble opinion, there’s only one thing funnier than watching Daryl Dixon try to settle into the Alexandria Safe Zone.

And that’s watching Merle Dixon try to settle into the Alexandria Safe Zone.

It’s also a somewhat strange thing, getting to have a sense of humor again. After everything their family has survived — from the Governor trying and failing to kill Michonne and Merle, only to come back months later and destroy their home to the nightmare that had been their separation afterwards to the twin disasters of Terminus and Grady Memorial Hospital — Beth had been sure that her laughter was long gone. She could still smile, even with the losses of Tyreese and Bob and everyone from the prison, but it took making it to the Safe Zone for her to remember how to laugh.

She wants to laugh now, watching Daryl and Merle. They’re clearly back from a hunt, with Merle shouldering the deer and Daryl with a string of squirrels. They’re also very clearly having an argument, Daryl waving around a bloody arrow while he gestures and Merle just as animated, but not able to do anything while he carries the deer. Beth is on watch duty and she glances down at Tara, nodding. Tara rolls the gates back.

“Looks like a good haul,” Tara observes, as the Dixon boys step inside and cease their bickering.

“Yeah,” Daryl mutters, quieting. Both he and Merle have a passionate dislike of this place, of the fancy houses and neat streets and the people inside the walls who remember what was and think to ask for things like pasta makers. It makes Daryl quiet and withdrawn, like he doesn’t want anyone to notice that he doesn’t fit in there. On the other hand, it makes Merle all the louder, more brash and crude, as if to tell the people of Alexandria — _look! You don’t scare me! You can’t call me worthless if I already do it first!_

Wounded boys, the both of them.

“Oi, Sugar Plum Fairy!” Merle whistles sharply up at her. “Come give me a hand getting this to the pantry, wouldya?”

Beth rolls her eyes and starts to climb down the ladder. When she starts to walk over, Merle has an all-too worrisome glint in his eyes, lips curling up. Beth stops in front of him, Daryl, and Tara, giving him the sweetest smile she has on her. “Course I can, Merle.”

Daryl hands her the string of squirrels and she puts it over her shoulder like it’s nothing because dead squirrels are not the grossest thing she’s seen lately, not by a mile. Daryl mutters, “thank you” with a wince, like it’s painful.

“Now is that any way to greet your man after a long hard day hunting for you?” Merle mocks, smirking and Beth huffs out hot air.

Right. Because the other hilarious thing in Beth’s life is that she’s also fake-dating Daryl Dixon.

See, this is how it happened.

* * *

_“Lots of people,” Beth muttered to Maggie, looking around at all the faces gathered. It made Beth want to shrink back, but that wouldn’t be polite. The people of Alexandria were welcoming them in — hell, they were throwing them a party. Beth would have to choke down her panic._

_"Yeah." Maggie grabbed her hand, squeezing it. She didn't look as scared as Beth felt, but Maggie was always the braver of the two of them. "It's gonna be okay, Bethy. We’re safe now.”_

_Beth didn't think it was. She didn't trust anyone, not after the Governor and Grady and the way she’d only narrowly escaped because Merle had blown Dawn’s head off the second he saw Beth tense. But Rick wanted them all to make this work, or at least try, and so she would, even if she felt the beginnings of a headache coming on. She pressed her cheek to Judith's little head, breathing in her soft baby smell in an effort to calm herself down as people chatted around her. Beth was just thinking about when she could make her exit without being rude when someone touched her elbow._

_Beth whirled around, jumpy. It was a kid who was reaching for her, one who was probably about her age or a little older. He had a nice smile, but there was something about his eyes that reminded Beth a little too much of sterile rooms and flickering hallways and green apple lollipops. Her breath was just starting to hitch when suddenly a dry, cackling laugh rang out across the room and stopped everyone in their tracks._

_Merle was holding a bottle of whiskey and drinking it straight as he chuckled and shook his head at the kid. “Barking up the wrong tree there, dipshit.”_

_“What?” the kid demanded and Beth was of the same mindset, but she’d learned in the past several months not to question Merle’s oddities. Usually there was a point, if not always one she understood._

_“I know she looks pretty, but trust me, you don’t want none of that,” Merle had stated and everyone was frowning then, confused. “Cause she might not pack a pretty punch, but her boyfriend sure does.”_

_“Boyfriend?” the kid asked stupidly and then Merle nodded to where Daryl was standing by the door, looking like he desired nothing more than to get the hell out of there. The kid blanched and then scurried away, leaving Beth gaping at Merle in shock._

_“What was that for?” she hissed and he shrugged, taking another swig while Daryl came over, red in the face._

_“Here’s a lesson for free, Mary Magdalene. Men respect another man's property before they respect a woman's no. Best thing you can do to get an asshole to stop harassing you is to make him think you belong to someone else."_

_With that advice still ringing in her ears, Beth looked at Daryl in trepidation, until he finally shrugged, gnawing on the side of his thumb as he rumbled in his low, deep voice, "come find me if any of them give you any trouble." And then he stomped out of the house._

* * *

And that's how it'd started. The rumor has spread slowly but surely across the Safe Zone. Beth is dating Daryl, and he's not overly fond of sharing his things, so now mostly everyone leaves her well enough alone. And while their immediate family all seem to find it either hilarious or smart, depending on their persuasion, no one finds it more amusing than a one Merle Dixon.

But see, as it turns out, being Daryl Dixon's fake girlfriend isn't that much different from being Daryl Dixon's friend. Beth had already been in charge of making sure he actually ate something; being his girlfriend just means that Carol hands her a plate and Beth brings it to wherever he is; on guard duty, tinkering with his bike in Aaron’s garage, walking around with Rick and talking about the community’s weak points.

And Daryl likes Judith, who Beth usually has on her hip, so hanging out with him mostly involves the two of them watching the little girl, sometimes Carol or Carl or Rick with them, entertaining her with the odd mismatch of toys that they've been so kindly gifted by the people in the Safe Zone who are tickled pink to have a baby around again.

And since she’s fake dating Daryl Dixon, that means she’s fake…. Something to Merle Dixon.

“C’mon Merle,” she orders, rolling her eyes, looking at the discomfort on Daryl's face at the suggestion. “No one’s around.”

“Might be.” Merle glances up the empty streets. “Better safe than sorry, eh?”

The quickest way to shut Merle up, Beth has learned, is to give Merle what the hell he wants. So Beth stretches up and presses a short, chaste kiss to Daryl’s cheek. When she comes back down, Daryl’s cheeks are red and Merle is smirking and Tara even has a grin on her face.

“Y’all are so cute,” Tara says sweetly and Daryl grumbles something and stomps off.

“Stop antagonizing him,” Beth tells Merle sternly, as they start walking to the pantry.

Merle looks at her, the picture of redneck innocence, blue eyes wide in his lined face, and says, “me?”

“Yes, you.” Beth glares at him. Once, Merle had scared the living daylights out of her. Back at the prison, when he’d came back with Michonne and decided to stay, he’d been even worse than Daryl for his wildness. But it just took sobriety, no nonsense from Carol, Daryl smacking him upside the head daily, sermons from her daddy, and then Merle had turned into the kind of guy who got Michonne to safety in the aftermath of the prison’s fall and saved Beth’s life.

The only reason he scares her now is because Beth’s pretty sure he’s going to give Daryl an aneurism.

“I ain’t doing nothing, Farrah Fawcett,” he chortles and Beth rolls her eyes. “Unless you want these boys falling all over you—”

“I have to pretend to date him, I know,” Beth cuts him off. “But it makes Daryl mad. I don’t want to piss him off.”

“Why you think it pisses him off, hmm?” Merle points out, as Beth opens the door to the pantry.

“Because he doesn’t want some kid hanging around him?” Beth retorts, thinking that there’s plenty of young women in Alexandria and Daryl might have his eye on one and she’s messing it up for him, using him like she does just because she’s still twitchy around anyone who isn’t family.

“Oh, I think he wants something hanging off him, very much,” Merle throws back at her with his best leer and she sets the squirrels on the counter while Olivia bustles through the house to them.

“Stop,” she tells him once more, “or I’m gonna be telling people you’re my boyfriend next.”

“You wish, Cabbage Patch Kid!” he calls as she leaves him and Olivia to dress the deer.

* * *

Beth finds Daryl at Aaron’s house. He’s still fine tuning the bike, and Beth imagines it’s less out of necessity and more out of needing something to do with his hands. She doesn’t bother him for a minute, simply standing and watching him work, hands and arms dirty, red rag over his shoulder instead of in his pocket. It’s filthier than usual and Beth thinks about taking it from him so she can actually wash it for once.

“Sorry about Merle, earlier,” she says, to break the silence. Daryl glances at her, eyes narrowed into a squint before he gives a little shrug, turning back to the bike.

“Just Merle being Merle.”

“Yeah,” Beth says softly, because it is just Merle trying to make everyone mad. He’s happiest when everyone, especially Daryl, is on edge, for reasons Beth doesn’t understand. “Told him to quit it though. Nice enough you’re doing this for me, don’t need you uncomfortable the whole time.”

“Mhmm.” Daryl doesn’t even look at her now, still tinkering with the bike.

Beth watches for a little bit and then her curiosity gets the best of her so she asks, “what were you and Merle fighting about? When you were coming back from your hunt?”

Daryl sits up so fast Beth instinctually takes a step back and looks around for the source of his panic, be it walkers or someone else unfriendly. When she realizes that it’s neither of those things that are alarming him but her, she goes still. What did she do now?

“How’d you know we were fighting?” he questions her, voice a bit rough. Beth, startled, can only shrug.

“You…” how can she explain to him that she’s just observed over time how they interact with each other? Knows when they’re angry with one another, when they’re okay, when they’re side by side in fighting stances and always have each other’s backs. She can only shrug. “Dunno. Could just tell.”

Daryl narrows his eyes, but Beth doesn’t back down. She’s not sure why Daryl is acting weird about this, but she’s not going to cower in fear over it or anything. After everything that they went through, Daryl can’t scare her anymore. Not when she knows just how wonderful he is. Whatever weirdness this is with Merle, he’ll explain it to her, probably sooner than later if she just waits him out.

“Merle being Merle,” he tells her finally, going back to the bike, though Beth can tell even with her untrained eyes that he’s not really doing anything.

“Merle’s been Merle a lot lately,” Beth remarks, watching to see his reaction. Daryl grunts something that she can’t quite understand, and then Aaron walks out the front door and calls a hello. Beth waves back; he’s the only one from Alexandria that knows that she’s not actually dating Daryl, so she doesn’t have to put on an act here.

“How are you?” Aaron asks her and Beth manages a natural, normal smile for once.

“Good. Really good. Just talking with Daryl about Merle.”

“Merle.” Aaron chuckles. “What’d he destroy now?”

Beth almost says — _my friendship with Daryl, I think_ — but then she decides not to bring it up. Instead she laughs, shrugs, makes a joke about Merle peeing on some flowers, and then says her goodbyes.

Daryl doesn’t even look up when she walks off.

* * *

Beth lifts the window of the house gently and carefully slips through the small gap. Maggie and Glenn’s room is at the end of the hallway and Maggie always wakes up when Beth walks past. It’s like a sixth sense or something, so when Beth wants to sneak out, it’s through the window, down the roof, and over to where she can jump from the roof onto the soft grass below. She’s always sure to roll out of the fall and then rise up on her feet, glancing back to see if anyone has heard her.

The house stays dark, so Beth continues on.

She’s not sure why she takes these nighttime jaunts. Maybe it’s because after Grady, she needs to know that she can still leave. That she can get up and go, and no one will stop her. It helps quiet the voices in her head, helps put the ghosts back in their closets. It’s been getting better. She’s down to maybe twice a week or so. When they first arrived, she’d gone out almost every single night.

“Gonna break an ankle if you keep jumping off of shit like that, Angelica.”

Beth looks up at the nearest guard tower, scowling to see Merle looking down at her, unimpressed.

“Angelica?” she asks him pointedly and he chuckles.

“Yeah, that one might’ve been before your time.”

Beth has no idea what he’s talking about, but that’s not what she’s worried about right now. Instead she watches him warily, trying to get a read on him. “You gonna tell Maggie?”

“Tell her what?” Merle turns back to overlooking the land outside the walls. Not fully reassured, Beth goes to the ladder and climbs up into the tower, joining him. Everything’s quiet, but Merle still has a rifle strapped to his chest.

“That I’m out here,” Beth clarifies, coming to stand beside him. Merle glances at her but only for a moment.

“Shit, ain’t you an adult? Can’t you just do whatever you want?”

Beth fights back to urge to smile. She can’t — and Merle knows that. Maggie still treats Beth like a little kid most days. Everyone has done some regressing upon making it to Alexandria; Carol’s gone all Stepford wife on them, and Beth is pretty certain the other day she heard Rick scolding Carl for forgetting to take out the trash, because now they worry about things like trash. And Maggie had gone right back to being overprotective of her, never mind that Beth’s not the same girl she was at the prison, and certainly not the same girl she was at the farm.

For one, she’s not even scared of Merle anymore.

“Maggie’s still Maggie,” she says instead, gazing out over the trees. Merle makes a scoffing noise but leaves it, letting them drift into silence until Beth reveals, “I think I hate it here.”

She’s not sure why she’s telling him. It’s not like her and Merle are close. But Beth owes everything to him, after what he did at Grady. The way he’d shot Dawn, no hesitation, no questions, just a bullet to the skull even though Rick had said to holster their weapons. And afterwards, when the other cops had stood down because it was only about Dawn, Beth had looked at him with wide, shell shocked eyes and Merle had just shrugged and told her that he could tell something was off, something was wrong from the way that Beth looked at Dawn, and so Merle made a call.

Merle understands a lot more than anyone gives him credit for, and so Beth thinks he might understand this.

“Why’s that?” Merle mutters, keen eyes tracking a lone owl as it rises into the air and floats into the distance. “It’s your sorta place, cherry pie.”

“Is it?” Beth asks him coldly, thinking of Grady and the aftermath. Once, she never would’ve questioned Merle. Hell, she would’ve agreed with him whole heartedly that Alexandria is a dream come true. And it is. Beth just can’t seem to muster up all the wonder she would have had, before.

“Sure as hell ain’t mine,” Merle remarks, looking over his shoulder at the houses. “Only time I might’ve been in a place like this before was if I was robbing someone.”

“But that was before,” Beth reminds him, thinking of the moonshine shack and Daryl. “You got away from it.”

“Yeah, only cause the undead made me run headfirst into all of this,” he grumbles, in a tone that seems to be annoyed but isn’t quite. “Hell, if there weren’t walkers tryna take a chunk out of everything dear and precious to them, these people might still have turned me away, even with my… Reformation.”

Beth thinks of who Merle was before the clash with the Governor, who he was at the prison, and who he was when Beth was found again by her family in the nightmare that was Atlanta. 

“I wouldn’t turn you away,” she says quietly and he gives a hoarse little laugh, shaking his head.

“Don’t need you telling me I’m worthy,” he informs her, but there’s no malice in his voice. “I know what I am. Save it for my brother.”

And so they’re arrived at their most frequent topic of conversation; Daryl. Beth scowls at Merle for bringing him up, though she’s unsure why. Lately it feels like things have changed between her and Daryl yet again, and not for the better. Beth is choosing to blame Merle and his stupid idea that they be ‘dating’ even if it has saved her the pain of pushy Alexandrian boys giving her looks she's sure as hell not ready for.

“Leave him be,” she orders, wondering why she’s even indulging him. In her experience, give Merle an inch and he’ll take a mile, especially when it comes to winding Daryl up. She’s not sure why he gets such a kick out of it, only that whenever he pushes Daryl into a rage, all he does is sit back and laugh.

“Why don’t you leave him be, strawberry shortcake?” he gives her a sidelong look, lit by the moonlight and Beth’s scowl only deepens.

“I’m trying to, only you’re the one who thought that we should play house together and now the only thing that keeps anyone from bothering me is cause they think Daryl’s gonna put an arrow in their eye if they do!” she reminds him hotly. It’s Merle’s fault they’re in this mess anyways.

Beth can’t blame Merle for the moonshine shack or the funeral home or even for what had happened after Grady, the way Daryl refused to talk to her but always kept his eyes on her, like he was scared she’d vanish again. She can’t blame Merle for how odd things are, how they feel so off but Beth can’t figure out how, and she can’t ask Daryl about it. But she can blame Merle for this and so she sure as hell will.

“Why you think that is, huh?” he demands. “Can’t believe everyone in this whole place is smarter than you two!”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Beth matches Merle’s hostility with her own. Maybe this is what she’s been fixing for. A fight, even if it is with the wrong Dixon.

“Daryl ain’t no Julie Andrews,” Merle tells her forcefully. “Ain’t no way he’s that good an actor. And an idiot to boot?”

“Hey!” she says sharply, because while she’ll tolerate Merle busting Daryl’s balls, she won’t tolerate him being an asshole about him. “Don’t talk about him like—“

“How come you two don’t see it?” Merle looks angry and Beth falls silent. She’s not scared of Merle hurting her, but she is scared of really pissing him off. She knows what he’s capable of. “How come you two keeping getting miracles, keep getting chances, and you’re wasting them, huh?”

“What are you…” Beth trails off, staring at Merle in confusion. He scoffs at her, looking back over the trees.

“Fools,” he mutters darkly, “both’a ya. Wasting what we got here.”

“And you’re not?” Beth challenges him. “The way you try to antagonize everyone here? The way you act like they’re gonna treat you like you’re scum? Yelling at them, pushing them away before they can push you away? Acting all high and mighty just because you’re scared that if you let them in they might hurt you?”

“You don’t know nothing,” he spits at her. “And I ain’t the point here. Point is, you and Daryl been acting like you’re scared of the other. Why the hell’s that?”

“I…” Beth doesn’t know. Because until Merle’s little lie, she and Daryl had been avoiding each other. It was like they didn’t know what to say, going from being just the two of them to being back with their entire family. He’d muttered something to her on the way out of the hospital, something about being glad she was alright, like that made up for the fact that she’d been taken from him. And Beth hadn’t known what to say then, and she still didn’t know what to say now. Everything seems so hollow after that.

“Tell you why.” Merle has a glint in his eye, but not one of anger or malice. “Because you both want it. And ol’ Merle over here, well I’m doing my best. But I can only do so much. You’re gonna have to make the first move, sugar tits.”

“The first… What?” Beth stares at him blankly. What the hell is he going on about, the first move?

“Goes like this.” Merle, lifelong smoker, clears his throat, then adopts a fake high, girly accent, southern drawl even twangier than usual. “‘cuse me, Mr. Dixon, sir. Well my name is Goldilocks and I’ve been making eyes at you since I was nothing but a little piece of jailbait. Sure would be nice if you’d pull your head out your ass and give me some of that sweet, sweet —“

“Merle!” Beth cuts him off furiously and he chuckles, unbothered. “Daryl don’t like me like that!”

And it’s cruel of Merle to imply that he does. Because Beth has had her eyes on him for a long while and that’s a problem. She’s not sure when it started. Probably the funeral home if she’s being honest. Maybe before that, if she thinks about it a little bit longer. Absence did indeed make the heart grow fonder, especially when that absence was caused by one party’s forceful removal from the other and a brief stint with indentured servitude. But she won’t take Merle giving her hell for it.

And she won’t take him giving Daryl hell for it either.

“I know my baby brother better than anyone else,” he tells her, voice back to seriousness and eyes back over the trees. “Know him better than he knows himself, I think. And I know when he looks at something and wants it so damn bad that his whole body hurts with it. That’s how he looks at you.”

Beth can’t take anymore of Merle’s teasing or mocking or whatever the hell this is. She goes back down the ladder and flees into the night, silently fuming and willing the tears back into her eyes.

* * *

“So.” Maggie looks over at her with a smile. “How you gonna break up with Daryl?”

“What?” Beth chokes on the water she’s drinking. Maggie laughs and Michonne looks over, eyebrows raised.

“Well, you can’t keep dating him forever, Beth,” Maggie says, like it’s obvious. “What if a boy here catches your eye? What if a girl catches Daryl’s?”

“That’ll be the day,” Glenn mutters with a grin at Maggie but it oddly makes Beth bristle.

Why are they making fun of Daryl? He’s not Merle. He doesn’t start making eyes at every woman he sees. And that’s a good thing. That’s just Daryl. He doesn’t trust easy. Doesn’t open up any easier. And that’s not something to be made fun of, even if Glenn is only teasing. It’s smart. Daryl’s been through a lot and he’s came out the other side stronger. So what if he doesn’t chase women around? As far as Beth is concerned, that’s a good thing.

She doesn’t think about the jealousy welling in her stomach.

“I don’t want to catch anyone’s eyes,” Beth mutters, rolling out the dough and Maggie quiets, obviously remembering the clipped tones with which Beth had used to describe her time at Grady. The men she had endured at Grady. The very reason why this whole ‘fake dating’ situation had arisen in the first place.

“I just thought it might be better to, you know, call things off,” Maggie says gently, “before tonight.”

Right. Tonight. The big picnic and party they are having. Beth’s not sure what’s the cause for celebration, beyond the whole fact that they’re alive and kicking and had another day in this world. She doesn’t understand a lot of things about Alexandria but she’s not going to question their little oddities, not when it means they’ll provide her with new clothes and food that isn’t rotten.

“What about tonight?” Beth asks tersely, shaping the dough now. Maggie glances at her, then at Glenn and Michonne. They both look to Beth and then look away again, like they’re not getting involved with whatever is happening between the Greene sisters.

“You’re telling me that you’re gonna spend the whole time with Daryl’s arm around you?” Maggie looks a little perturbed and Beth grits her teeth, trying not to pound the dough into oblivion.

“Maybe I just won’t go then,” she suggests flatly and Maggie’s hand comes to rest over one of Beth’s, stilling her movements.

“Hey,” she says gently and Beth sighs, glancing at her. “This is a safe place, Bethy. You don’t… You don’t have be scared. It’s okay.”

“I’ll talk to Daryl,” she says, instead of shaking Maggie’s hand off like she really wants to. “I won’t make him uncomfortable, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“Beth, I…” Maggie calls, as Beth departs out the front door.

Merle’s words are still ringing in her head. They have been since last night, when she’d lain awake unable to think about anything else. Because he didn’t mean that Daryl has feelings for her. He couldn’t. Daryl doesn’t see her like that. Maybe there was a hint of it. Before. Before she was weak, before she was taken and he had to fight to get her back and she was back to being a liability. A burden.

There was a chance and she’d lost it.

She couldn’t risk losing Daryl any further.

She goes to Aaron and Eric’s house. Daryl had gone out with Aaron and Merle, trying to round up some supplies Eugene had deemed ‘hyper-critical if we are to enjoy the fruits of our solar powered labors’ so there is no telling when they’d be back, but it is better to wait here than back with Maggie. Beth is sick of everyone having all sorts of opinions on everything she does and who she does it with. She is sitting in the driveway, writing in her journal, when suddenly a mug of steaming tea gently taps her shoulder.

“Oh.” she looks up in surprise to see Eric smiling at her, offering her the mug while holding another one in his hand that he sips from.

“You looked like the kind of soul who could use a cup of tea,” he remarks lightly and Beth takes it.

“How’d you know?” she asks, without bothering to deny it. He waits until she’s taken the mug before he sits down beside her.

“It’s a talent my grandma had,” he tells her with a tiny smile. “She just always knew. Guess I got more than just her eyes.”

“Thank you,” she says after she remembers her manners. “This… Thank you.”

“You know what other talent I got from my grandma?” he asks, sipping from his mug. “Being a really good listener.”

Beth looks at him, wondering if Aaron has explained to him the fake nature of her relationship. Just in case he hasn’t, Beth gives a little shrug and says vaguely, “I don’t know. It's not that anything's really wrong, I guess. Just readjusting.”

“Mhmm.” Eric nods understandingly. “You and everyone else, I see. Can be hard, to get back to this after you’ve been out there. But you have Daryl, right?”

“Yeah,” Beth says, a hair too quickly and Eric hides a smile by taking another sip of tea. “I… Have Daryl.”

“Doesn’t make it easy though, a relationship in all of this.” Eric isn’t looking at her and somehow that makes it easier for Beth to start talking. Start lying.

“We… Things were better, before. And then stuff happened. I… It hasn’t been the same since. I don’t know how to talk about it,” she admits. “I’m scared that it’s broken, that it can’t be how it was. But I’m more scared that if we admit it’s broken, then it’s all over.”

She stares down into her mug of tea and Eric sits beside her, silent. That’s the truth of it. Screw Maggie’s over-protectiveness and Merle’s taunting and the gentle teasing from the rest of their family. Beth is scared that she and Daryl will be forced to admit that there’s nothing there — maybe there never was, or maybe it’s been destroyed beyond repair now. She’s terrified of that answer.

“We’re people, not parts and pieces,” Eric says finally. “We’re not broken. You and Daryl, whatever happened, it won’t break you guys apart. Not if you don’t let it. You have to talk about it. That’s what I’ve learned, with Aaron. You have to talk about it. And once you do, you’re stronger for it. We all grow, we all change. You and Daryl will do it together, trust me. I’ve seen the way that he looks at you.”

“He — what?” Beth looks sharply at Eric, who smiles around another swallow of tea. Then she shuts her mouth, because they are supposed to be dating after all.

“He looks at you like I look at Aaron,” Eric tells her simply. “You turn the corner and everything in him just… Clicks.”

“Oh,” Beth says softly, wondering how to tell him that he’s mistaken, but at that moment, Daryl, Merle, and Aaron walk up the street. Aaron’s between the two brothers in a way that suggests to Beth that they’ve been fighting again. It’s like what Daddy used to do with her and Maggie; separate them before they come to blows. A smile starts to cross her face before she can stop it, wondering what’s been egging those two on.

“Like that,” Eric says gently, when Daryl looks up and catches Beth sitting in the driveway.

And she has to admit, he’s got a point. For the briefest second, the scowl slips off Daryl’s face and reveals something much softer, something much more like happiness or at the very least, relief. The crossbow drops a little lower, the lines in his forehead smooth out, and his steps elongate, just slightly.

Merle’s changes are less subtle.

“Oi! Claire Standish!” he shouts, face splitting into a grin. “Whatcha got for me?”

“Claire Standish?” Eric asks with some confusion and Beth sighs.

“Merle likes to give nicknames,” she explains, finishing off her tea. “He thinks it’s insulting, but it’s mostly amusing trying to figure out what he’s referencing. Gives me something to think about, at least.”

“Is he talking about… The Breakfast Club?” Eric demands, equal parts bemused and impressed.

“That he is.” Beth presses herself up onto her feet with a little groan at the stiffness of her muscles. “Underestimate Merle Dixon at your own peril.”

“What are you doing here?” Aaron asks her as Beth helps heave Eric to his feet. Eric gives Aaron a look and he nods, the unspoken signal that everything is okay. Beth looks to Daryl and he does the same, the look he used to give her in the woods before.

“Just needed to chat with Daryl about tonight,” she says, feigning sweetness and Merle snorts but doesn’t say anything.

“Yeah, g’on,” Daryl mutters to Merle, nodding to Aaron and Eric.

“Going for a little lover’s stroll?” Merle asks them with a leer and Beth flips him the bird before turning and walking away. Best to get Daryl away from his brother and quickly; if they’ve already been fighting, it won’t do them any good to put Beth in the middle of it. She’s doesn’t have to turn around to know Daryl is following her.

“Get everything you need out there?” Beth asks, to fill the silence after a pause. Daryl nods, looking like he wants to say more but doesn’t. “And everything go okay? Merle still being Merle?”

“Yeah.” Daryl eyes her when they stop next to the wall, away from any ears. “What’s goin’ on?”

He looks so worried. Beth has Merle’s, Maggie’s, and Eric’s voices in her head; she briefly shuts her eyes to try to drown them all out. Then she takes a deep breath and reminds him, “that party thing is tonight.”

“Oh.” Daryl blinks like he’s confused by this. “‘kay?”

“Are you, uh, gonna go?” Beth asks him carefully and Daryl looks so briefly confused by this question that Beth actually sort of wants to giggle. “It’s just cause — Maggie said you wouldn’t want to go. And you don’t gotta if you don’t wanna! But if you don’t, people might… Well… If I went and you didn’t, might seem funny. Considering.”

_Considering your brother has this whole place believing that we’re together because I’m a coward and was too weak to fight getting taken from you and effectively ruined our chances to be anything. If you even wanted that in the first place._

“Oh.” he seems taken aback, but for some reason his eyes dart back to the house where Merle, Aaron, and Eric await. “Uh… Yeah.”

“Yeah like you wanna or yeah there’s no way in hell you’re getting dragged to one of those?” Beth asks him pointedly but gently. It’s always coaxing answers out of him, but she’s grown practiced. Wait him out. Use all the words so that he doesn’t have to. Be patient and speak softly and don’t look him in the eye until the last second and learn all these things about him, for what?

“Gonna be guys there,” Daryl mutters, looking down at the dirt and the grass and Beth bites her lip, nodding.

“If you don’t wanna go, I —“

“You wanna go?” he asks her at the same time as she starts stammering excuses. Beth shuts up, a bit shocked, and stares at Daryl. She expects him to drop his gaze, mumble something, and then walk away like he usually does, but instead he looks back at the house, squares his shoulders, then turns back to her and repeats in a firmer tone, “you wanna go?”

“Oh.” Beth hasn’t considered that route, honestly. Does she? She doesn’t like the crowds. And she doesn’t like the people watching her. But… She should try. Rick said they need to try. “I guess… I sorta did. But I didn’t want you to feel like you had to.”

“Nah.” he waves a hand. “We can go. If you want.”

“I do.” pleasantly surprised, Beth resists the urge to beam at him. “Um… Okay. I’ll… Go.”

“Mhmm.” now Daryl drops his gaze and Beth notices that his neck seems red. They walk back to the houses in silence and Daryl peels off to enter Aaron and Eric’s where he’s been staying, and Beth continues on to the one she lives in with Glenn and Maggie and Tara. Merle is sitting on the porch of the house across the street, the one for Abraham and Rosita and Eugene and Father Gabriel. He looks up and smirks at her.

“Not a single word,” Beth warns him, raising a finger at him. This has been a good moment and she’s not going to let Merle Dixon ruin it.

And to her surprise, he remains silent until she slams the door behind her.

* * *

“You look real nice,” Maggie says carefully, as Beth gets ready in front of the mirror in the bathroom. Maggie's leaning against the doorframe to the bathroom, already done with her attire for the evening. The time for pretty sundresses and wedge heels is long gone; now their nice attire consists of unstained jeans, tops that aren’t ripped, and their finest guns and knives. But Beth can still wash her hair and braid it back nicely, make herself presentable. Even swipe on some expired mascara and eyeliner, just for the hell of it.

“Thanks.” Beth finishes the braid off with a hair tie. Usually she pulls her hair up off her neck with how thick it is and how hot she gets in the summer, but the evening has cooled off enough that she thinks she can get away with leaving it down and curly. Still braids her bangs back though. That’s just habit.

“This mean Daryl’s coming? Or are you going by yourself?” Maggie asks pointedly and Beth gives herself one last look over in the mirror, nodding slightly. She looks good. Maybe not beautiful. But good.

“Yeah, I guess so,” she informs Maggie, struggling to keep her tone even and level. This… Might be a date. Could be a date. Except for the fact they’re already dating and everything’s all fucked up.

Beth is not taking Merle’s advice. There’s no way in hell that Merle Dixon is the voice of reason here. No way in _hell._

“And he’s okay with it?” Maggie needles and Beth turns to look at her sister, frowning.

“I asked him, if that’s what you’re worried about,” she says tartly. “He’s fine with it.”

“Beth.” Maggie catches her wrist as Beth pushes past her into the hallway. “I just…”

“What, Maggie?” Beth asks, facing off with her. “What?”

“I’m just worried about you,” Maggie admits and Beth wants to soften, because Maggie is still her big sister and still has her best interests at heart but it’s time she stops thinking of Beth as a little girl. “It’s just… Daryl?”

“What’s so wrong with Daryl?” Beth retorts sharply and Maggie has the good grace to look a little ashamed.

“Nothing,” she says quickly. “I just… What Merle said, what he did… It made sense. But I don’t want you getting hurt over this. Because… I know that there’s something there between you and Daryl. From you, at least.”

Beth tenses. But of course Maggie knows; after all, she’d been there for Beth’s first crush and Beth first’s kiss and Beth’s first real boyfriend and then Beth’s first real breakup. Of course she’d look at Beth and know exactly what’s on her mind. Exactly what she’s feeling. Especially with Daryl. Especially after all of this. So she looks at Maggie and she tells her the truth.

“I don’t know how Daryl feels about me Maggie. And I don’t know if I want to know how Daryl feels about me,” she admits to her big sister. “But… If there’s a chance, and I miss it? Or I waste it?”

Goddamnit, she’s taking Merle’s advice.

Maggie seems to want to say something; her mouth is certainly jumping in the way that it does when she has a comment she really wants to make. But she doesn’t. Instead she just nods and bows her head and lets Beth slip past her, down the stairs and past Carol and Rick, talking at the counter. When she leaves the house, she’s surprised to see Merle is back on the porch, but he’s showered and in decent clothes.

He’s going to the picnic too?

“Sure look nice, Daisy Duke,” he remarks and Beth rolls her eyes.

“You too, Merle,” she replies, stopping and putting her hands on her hips. Normally she’d keep on walking, but Merle willingly attending an event he’d usually avoid has put her on edge. “You shower and everything?”

“Like what you see?” he spreads his arms wide and grins. Beth scoffs at him and his grin deepens. “Nah, you like the other Dixon, right? Well I promise not to take offense, little lady.”

“Merle,” she says sharply and he rises, coming alongside to take her arm. “What are you doing?”

“Escorting you to pick up Darylina,” he says, like it’s obvious. “I feel like it’s your prom or something. Think you’ll pose for pictures?”

“Stop being a jackass.” Beth pulls her arm from his grip and gives him a smack, for good measure. “You doing this to Daryl earlier, huh? That why he was so mad when you come back from the run?”

“Me?” Merle presses a hand to his chest, like she’s wounded him. “I’d never.”

“You would though,” Beth reminds him. “Daryl’s just being sweet. Taking me to the party.”

She’ll admit her feelings to Maggie, but she’d rather die than give Merle that ammunition.

“What’s it gonna take, huh?” Merle demands, stopping her in front of Aaron and Eric’s house.

“What’s what gonna take?” Beth retorts, glaring up at him. Merle glancing at the house then back at her.

“Christ, I gotta lock you two in a closet like you’re 12 years old again and this is 7th Heaven? I mean, I gotta do everything around this damn place, including helping my brother and Madonna over here get laid —“

“Merle!” Beth shrieks and automatically reaches up to slap him, but Merle catches her wrist in a tight grip. Beth opens her mouth hotly, either to tell him off strongly or tell him 7th Heaven was _not_ supposed to be sexual, when a voice rings out.

“Merle!” Daryl is exiting the house at a brisk pace and he looks properly pissed, glaring at his brother's grip of Beth. For a second, all Beth can think is that she’s gonna have to break up yet another Dixon brother fight, before she realizes that Merle has already let her go.

And Daryl looks good. Like, really good. He’s wearing unripped jeans, and they must be a pair from Aaron or Eric, because they’re a little bit tighter than Daryl would usually be caught in. Just accentuates the great shape he’s in, honestly. And his button-down actually has sleeves, even if the top few buttons are undone and the sleeves are pushed halfway up his forearms. It’s a dark navy and seems to be mostly intact. He’s not carrying his bow for once, but he has his knives and a gun tucked into his belt, a reminder of their world. His hair is still damp, but he’s clean and when he comes to put himself between Beth and Merle, Beth gets a hint of something that actually smells like deodorant or maybe aftershave.

“Easy there tiger,” Merle laughs, but his eyes are shrewd and calculating, watching Daryl with his hands. “We were only messing around.”

“Yeah?” Daryl growls and glances over his shoulder at Beth. She doesn’t know what else to do; telling Daryl the truth will just set him off and she doesn’t want him getting into a fight right now. So she lies.

“Yeah. Just Merle being Merle.”

“Ol’ Merle being Merle.” said man smirks at the both of them. “And Merle better be getting a move on. Better get a plate of dessert before it’s all gone, you know what I’m saying?”

His pointed look at Beth leaves nothing to be imagined. She waits until Daryl’s back is turned so she can flip Merle the bird and he laughs, waving a hand and walking away, whistling. Daryl turns back to her, concern written all over his face as he asks lowly, “you good?”

“Yeah.” it’ll take more than that from Merle to rattle her, so Beth looks up into Daryl’s face and does her best to give him as reassuring a smile as she can manage. “You look real nice.”

Daryl blushes. He actually blushes, looking down at his clothes and one hand awkwardly coming up to rub the back of his head, messing up his hair. Beth smiles as he glances at her, taking in the clean jeans and flannel top she’s wearing, along with her curling hair. She sees his eyes linger on her face, perhaps trying to place why she looks so different. Has he ever see her in makeup before?

“You too,” he mutters and Beth is saved from having to answer by the slam of a door in a frame and Aaron and Eric walking out, Eric holding a covered dish.

“You two ready?” Aaron asks them with a smile. Beth nods and smiles at him, falling into step.

There is a spot near the pond that had been planned to be a park. There’s a playground and picnic tables and that’s where everyone gathers. Beth helps Eric with the food while Daryl and Aaron go to say hello to Rick and Michonne. People are mingling around, talking, but as long as Beth stays near Aaron or Eric or Daryl or Rick, most everyone avoids her. And she keeps an eye on Merle, as he gets food and talks to Tara, sitting near Rosita and Eugene with a heaping plate of food.

“Here.” Eric passes her two plates of food with a smile. “You and Daryl should eat.”

“Thanks.” Beth gives him a grateful nod and takes the food, bringing it to where Daryl stands, listening to Glenn tell him and Rick about some place that they’re going to make a run to or want to make a run to or made a run to or whatever else. Everything revolves around scavenging, what they have, what they don’t, what they need. She gently nudges Daryl’s arm with her elbow, handing him the plate when he looks down at her in confusion.

“We can talk about it later, you should eat,” Glenn says quickly and Daryl opens his mouth, likely to protest, but Glenn waves a hand. “I gotta find Maggie anyways. She’s probably giving some poor soul a lecture.”

“I’ll go find Michonne,” Rick tells Daryl, clapping his shoulder and then smiling at Beth. “Find you in a bit.”

“Thanks,” Daryl mutters, when it’s just them and Beth smiles as she leads him to a picnic table.

“You’re welcome,” she says easily, spearing the fresh vegetables on her fork and taking a bite. “Thanks for coming with me. I know this isn’t always your scene.”

“Yeah, well.” Daryl glances around with a frown. “If he can make it work, I can too.”

Beth follows his gaze to land on Merle. His big brother is talking and eating, apparently at ease and oblivious to the sidelong looks he is getting from the residents of Alexandria. That seems to be Merle's speciality; he lets the dirty looks and the hushed whispers roll right off his back. He remains the loud and brash Merle he’s always been. But he doesn’t let anyone near him that’s not family.

“We’re all trying,” she says softly. Merle’s words keep floating through her head, then Eric’s, then Maggie’s. It’s like a loop, confusing her endlessly. But when she’s watching Daryl, it fades slightly. It brings her back to when it was just them and a funeral home and endless possibilities. Beth had been brave, back then. Before she got taken and it felt like this thing between them was stolen away too.

“Yeah.” Daryl nods at that and Beth is about to summon her bravery and open her mouth when a shrill cry splits the air.

“No!”

Judith is having a temper tantrum, laying on the ground with her little feet and fists flailing in the air, hitting the ground with all her might. Both Rick and Michonne are kneeling beside her and Carl isn’t too far off, but anytime any of them even tries to touch Judith, her furious volume increases. Beth glances at Daryl for a split second and he nods at her. Beth scoots back and away from the table, walking quickly over to where the little girl is wailing.

“Thank god,” Michonne mutters and Beth kneels, deftly avoiding Judith’s limbs, scooping her up. Sometimes Judith gets overwhelmed with the amount of people, the noises. Given the general chaos of the picnic, Beth’s sure that Judith is just searching for a little peace and quiet. So she takes her down to the dock, ignoring the way Judith screams in her ear and beats her little fists on Beth’s back.

Rick and Michonne remain where they are. They trust that Beth will handle this and the best. Besides, no one is going to miss the babysitter at the neighborhood party. The two constables though, they’ll be in high demand. Beth sits down on the dock and sets Judith out of front of her, giving the little girl some space. Judith is still crying but she’s not screaming and so Beth nods.

“I get it,” she tells her gently. “It’s all too much, isn’t it? Too many people. Too much noise. Just… Too much, isn’t it?”

Judith doesn’t respond. Of course she doesn’t. She’s just a toddler who probably missed her nap and had too many people trying to talk to her and hold her and jostle her about. Strange faces in a strange place. Yeah, Beth would throw a tantrum too if she could without consequences. She’s just as overwhelmed, she is just expected to control it better than a little girl.

Eventually, Judith lays down in Beth’s arms and stops sobbing, moving to little whimpers. Beth rubs her small back, sitting on the dock and dangling her feet in the water. She’s enjoying the peace and no matter how much she wanted to talk to Daryl, Judith has to come first. That’s something that they all can agree on. Judith is the most important thing to all of them.

“Can’t hide forever, prom queen,” comes a harsh voice and Beth doesn’t even jump or turn around.

“I wasn’t a prom queen,” she remarks idly. “I was too young when the turn happened. Never got old enough.”

“Yeah.” Merle heaves a sigh and sits down beside her. “That tracks.”

“No,” Judith mutters, hiding her face from Merle, who grins.

“Yeah, you don’t like that much, do you sweet pea?” he questions, rubbing a hand over his face. “I don’t think I like this ugly mug either.”

“It’s not that.” Beth rolls her eyes at him. “She’s sick of people in her space. That’s why she threw such a fit earlier.”

“And why you had to come to the rescue,” Merle acknowledges, nodding understandingly. “Saddest look I’ve ever seen on my brother’s face, watching you walk away.”

Beth cannot believe she’s doing this. Cannot believe that there’s a world in which she is going to Merle goddamn Dixon for advice, of all people. But as far as the authority on Daryl goes, he’s probably the best. And Beth needs to find her courage, to be brave. So she swallows her pride and quiets the voices in her head screaming at her that this is the worst possible idea and asks him, “Merle, how do I tell Daryl I’m in love with him?”

Merle coughs like he’s swallowed something hard or wrong. Beth patiently waits him out, still comforting Judith. And then he looks over at her and demands, _“what?”_

“How do I tell Daryl I’m in love with him,” Beth repeats patiently. “That’s what you want, isn’t it? That’s what you’ve been bugging me about for weeks now?”

Merle is speechless. He stares at her blankly for so long that Judith, who is still hiding from Merle, actually lifts her head and looks between the adults at the sudden silence. Beth can almost sees the gears in his head — rusted from age and copious drug use — start to click and grind into motion as he fully comprehends the meaning of her words. Then he gives a little nod and looks down at his hands.

"The first time I saw you, I hated you," Merle reveals to her and Beth turns to look at him, eyebrows raised at the change of focus there.

"Thanks?" she thinks of the first time that she saw Merle. Grinning like a madman, covered in blood, his stump encased in metal, standing outside the prison fence with Daryl and Rick. Beth's relief at Daryl being back was only slightly overshadowed by her fear of Merle, but that was before she’d gotten to know him. 

"Looked at you, saw everything I'd never gotten. Family that loved me, daddy that cared, a good, Christian upbringing." Merle picks at the wood on the dock and Beth sees an expression on his face that makes him look so much younger and softer. It looks like longing. "Pissed me right off, cause girls like you were always scared of me. Should've been scared of me, after everything I did to your sister. But remember what you did?" 

"Yeah." Beth can't resist the urge to grin at him, recalling the afternoon that Merle had begrudgingly formed respect for her. "Shot the ceiling." 

"You sure as shit did." Merle chuckles, a harsh rasp. "Didn't see that coming, not from you. Didn't see half the shit you did coming. Time you brought me dinner when I was on guard duty. Saving my ass when that walker was coming for me through the gate. Stitching up my stab wound." 

"Merle." Beth is enjoying this walk down memory lane, she really is. It's nice to recall how much Merle has changed and how much she's changed by proxy. But this isn't the point of the conversation. "What's this have to do with Daryl?" 

"Daryl ain't me, but we were sure as shit raised in the same hell," Merle mutters and Beth nods, thinking of the moonshine shack and the scars that litter Merle’s back, same as Daryl’s. The way that they both can fight, throw punches in similar fashions, look at her with discerning blue eyes that see more than they should. “I understand why the hell he fell in love with you, even if I don’t find you appealing myself. No offense, Jessie Spano.”

“None taken, John Bender,” she retorts and he gives her an amused look, sighing and sitting back, looking at the sunset.

“Just gotta tell him, I reckon,” he says finally, nodding like he’s thought a lot about this. Beth wonders if he has, actually. “Just come right out with it. Simple. Daryl doesn’t like the bullshit. Doesn’t like it when you say something and mean something else. Straight and clear.”

“What if he doesn’t feel the same way? What if I ruin everything?” Beth whispers, holding tightly to Judith. This is her one big fear, the one outcome she cannot even allow herself to think about. Because Daryl liking her back, that would be something incredible. But Daryl not feeling the same way? Ruining whatever fragile relationship they’ve scavenged since her kidnapping?

Losing anyone in this world would wreck Beth, but she’s got the feeling the lose of Daryl would be catastrophic.

“Don’t pretend you don’t see it, Hello Barbie.” Merle shakes his head. “There’s you and there’s him. Anyone who’s got eyes can see you’re one and the same. Daryl… He’s good. Always been good. Deserves the good you got in you. This world… Ain’t shit, but good things can still come from this damn mess. You deserve that. So does he.”

Merle ends his declaration nodding, looking happy at his statement. And Beth is too; he got through it with minimal cussing or name calling, which is a marvel for Merle. But even with the knowledge that he thinks Daryl loves her back, something else still tugs at Beth. So she watches him for a few long moments and then tells Merle Dixon softly,

“You deserve good things too, Merle.”

He doesn’t look at her. He simply chews his lip like he wants to but then finally shakes his head. “I got this place. That’s enough.”

“Maybe.” Beth thinks it could be. But Merle does deserve more than just a safe place and to be the guard dog at the door. He has changed. Daryl’s not the only Dixon who has good in him, especially for the people that he loves. But Merle’s not ready to see that, not ready for Beth to reveal that to him. So instead she shrugs and goes back to looking out over the water.

She smiles when Judith climbs off her lap and into Merle’s, the little girl babbling and calmed down from her tantrum. And Beth pretends not to see the soft, tender expression on Merle’s face as Judith pats his cheeks and pulls at the scruff on his jaw, the gentleness with which he handles the little girl.

* * *

Beth doesn’t get the chance to talk to Daryl after her discussion with Merle by the pond. Apparently they’ve identified a field hospital that looks to be untouched due to the swarth of walkers around it. It’s too high value of a target not to take the A team, which means Daryl, Rick, Abraham, Rosita, Tara, and Merle roll out at sunrise, taking with them supplies and enough guns to man a small army.

Beth doesn’t say goodbye. Beth never says goodbye.

But she does spend the next few days worrying and fretting over it. She does her best not to show anyone, but Maggie’s known her since the day she was born. Even with the amount of work she’s doing for the community, Maggie finds time to narrow her eyes at Beth and ask her what’s got her so jumpy. And Carol’s so damn perceptive, she sees every little thing and she’s known Beth for a long time. She makes Beth cookies and then keeps her busy with Judith so that Beth doesn’t have time to dwell, which is kind of her.

The worst is that even Enid, someone Beth only met upon her arrival to Alexandria, seems to guess that something is up. When Beth helps Judith walk around the little gazebo, Enid sits on the roof above her and watches, before demanding, “so which is it?”

“Which is what?” Beth replies, hands hovering as Judith takes tentative steps this way and that.

“Are you in love with Rick or Daryl?”

Beth straightens up so fast her head spins. She glares at Enid as she demands, “what?”

“I hope it’s not Merle,” Enid replies, voice apathetic. “That’d be real gross.”

So yeah. People know that it’s killing her, waiting for their group to come back. For Daryl to come home, so she can tell him…. Something.

She is with Judith when Carl comes running in to tell her that they’ve returned. Judith has just woken up from her nap, generally groggy and annoyed at the world, so Beth is holding her and rocking her around the living room when Carl bursts through the door, wild eyed and breathing heavily.

“They’re home,” he tells her, panting slightly and bending at the waist, massaging a stitch in his side. Beth frowns, opening her mouth to ask him why he’s telling her and they don’t just come themselves, when he cuts her off and answers it for her. “They’re in the infirmary.”

Beth almost drops Judith. Instead she passes the little girl off to Carl, a bit roughly, and takes off at a dead sprint for the infirmary. She knows how tough everyone on that crew is, so for them to be in the infirmary speaks to the serious nature of the injury. It occurs to her, three blocks over, that she might’ve just asked Carl who was hurt and spared herself a bit of terror, but it’s too late for that now.

Merle is standing on the porch with a group of people and he's the first one to hear her coming. He breaks away and catches Beth around the waist, the look on his face telling her everything that she needs to know. It’s not Rick or Rosita in there, not Tara or Abraham. It’s gotta be Daryl, it can only be Daryl. And the second Beth hits Merle's chest, she crumples, and Merle remains holding her upright.

“Hey,” he mutters, voice surprisingly tender in her ear. “Hey, Beth, c’mon. C’mon kid, work with me.”

Beth looks up at him in pure, abject terror. Words fail her; all she can is stare at Merle and try to decipher the expression on his face. Is Daryl alive? Dead? Badly injured? Has to be if he can’t just walk it off, recover at home with his family like he’d prefer. How bad? Will she get him back? Will there be time for her to tell him everything that she hasn’t? Because Merle is right.

Every second here is a miracle and she’d rather die than waste another second.

“Please,” she whispers raggedly, clutching Merle’s shirt in her hands. “Merle, he… _Please.”_

“C’mon.” Merle gets her back on her feet, holding her under her armpits until he trusts her to stand on her own again.

“How bad?” Beth croaks, terrified by the lack of general Merle-ness from Merle. No swearing, no joking, no mocking, no nicknames. Just his blue eyes on hers, the twist of his mouth, the way that he seems to hold himself like he’s made of brittle bone, the same way she feels like the slightest touch might shatter her.

Merle says nothing, but that says everything.

Daryl is in one of the bed, pale, with his head swaddled in bandages. Rosita is sitting at his bedside but moves instantly when she sees Beth and Merle. Beth collapses at his side, grabbing his hand and feeling for a pulse out of pure training, the vestiges of her father living on. It’s there, barely, weak and thready, but it still beating. The reassurance she gets from that isn’t a lot, but it’s enough for her to draw a ragged breath and look at Rick, who is being attended to.

“Wasn’t his fault,” Rick says hoarsely. “Mine. Got boxed in. Walkers from all directions. He saved us. Got us out. But… Whole thing came down on him.”

“He…” Beth doesn’t have the words. She can’t ask the question, she can’t speak into existence her greatest fear.

Rick grimaces. “Too soon to know.”

So she sits a vigil, at his side the entire time. The others filter in to tell her more of what happened, but Beth could care less. Maggie stops by, rubs her shoulders, tells her it’s all going to be okay even though Beth knows it’s the furtherest thing from that. Enid brings her something to eat and Beth sees the look in her eyes, knows that the young girl now understands just who it is that Beth carries in her heart. And Carl stays by her the longest, sitting across from her on Daryl’s other side, watching Daryl’s shallow breathing.

No one dares suggest that Beth leave.

Carol is the one who gently cajoles her into eating. Michonne convinces her that she’ll watch over Daryl while Beth showers. Glenn brings her anything she needs, be it a change of clothes or a brush. There’s not a whisper of her taking care of Judith or going back to minding the kids, but she knows Rick is probably struggling. At Daryl’s bedside she remains as people pass in and out, and the only one who watches her with understanding is Merle.

It takes Daryl three days to wake up. 

When he does, Beth is still at his side. She has been the entire time, regardless of any encouragement to leave. When he opens his eyes, Beth is holding his hands and dozing lightly, drifting off despite the chatter and general bustle of the infirmary. When she wakes up and looks at him only to find his blue eyes staring in bewilderment back at him, she about falls off the chair. 

"Daryl?" she demands, breathless, wondering if he's going to remember anything or if he'll be confused from one wicked concussion. 

"You okay?" he asks her, voice no more than a harsh rasp and she stifles a watery chuckle.

Of course the man has an entire building come down on his head and the first thing he does is ask if she's alright. That's Daryl Dixon for you. 

"Yeah," she tells him, squeezing his hand, "I am. Are you?" 

"Hurts," he grunts, shifting like he's trying to reach for his head. "Like... A bitch." 

"I'll get the doctor," Beth tells him, going to rise. He makes a noise in protest and then looks as surprised as she does by his unspoken desire for her to stay. Beth slowly sinks down, still holding his hand, watching his face. Her heart beats in an irregular pattern, like it too does not understand how to behave. Merle's voice rings in her ears and she thinks that just maybe, possibly...

This is her moment. 

"I..." Daryl looks a bit lost for words, be it from the hit to the head or that maybe he too senses that something is happening, something big. 

"I've been wanting to talk to you," she says softly. "This... The lie. That we've been telling people. About us dating. I wanted to talk to you about it." 

"Yeah." Daryl leans back, closing his eyes, but he doesn't let go of her hand. In fact, he holds it tighter. 

"I didn't mean for it to start. Merle threw us together, and it was easy, and so I just sort of let it happen," she admits. "But it was always more than that for me, Daryl. It's... It's been more than that for me for a long time. I think it's been that way since before Grady, but I got scared. I lost you. But to be honest... I've been talking to Merle. And he's convinced me to tell you. Or at least to try." 

That's it. That's her heart out in front of her, hands outstretched, waiting for him to react. And for a long time, he doesn't. He stays with his eyes shut, head against the pillow, holding her hand so tightly that Beth is beginning to lose feeling in the very tips. Then, to her utter alarm, she sees a tear begin to leak out and track down his cheek. 

He opens his eyes, looks at her, and questions, "when the hell was it a good idea to listen to Merle?" 

"I don't know." Beth is choking down emotions of her own and some laughter as well. "When he told me that we only get so many chances in this world. And we've already lost each other plenty of times. If I'd lost you for good, just now... If you'd lost me for good at Grady... If we got separated and never got the chance to tell each other how we feel, to do something about it... Wouldn't that just be a tragedy Daryl?" 

He looks at her blankly, like her words can't sink into his head. And then he looks down at their clasped hands, before looking back at her face. Beth holds still, scared of spooking him somehow, and finally he swallows hard, glances left and right like he's checking to make sure that they're really alone, and admits, 

"Don't deserve this. Not... You." 

"Daryl." Beth feels her heart breaking and her anger rising, somehow at the same time. "Yes, you do." 

"Let me finish," he mutters, almost a bit sullenly, and Beth clamps her mouth shut, worried that she's interrupted him and now he won't finish. He takes a deep breath like he's gathering his thoughts and then to her relief, he continues. "I... Merle told me the same thing. About... The chances. How we only got so many and how we been wasting them. Said what he did at the party, that was him trying to get us to realize it. This." 

"Merle." Beth shakes her head, hiding a smile. She never thought there'd be a world in which she owed so much to Merle Dixon, where she felt so fondly for him, but here they are. 

"Been giving me grief for weeks over you," Daryl grumbles. "Always telling me to make a move. But I didn't think you'd..." 

"Daryl." Beth cuts him off. She can't bear to hear him say again that he doesn't deserve her. "Daryl, I think I've been in love with you since the funeral home." 

Daryl avoids her eyes, looking down at their hands and blushing. Then he looks up and tells her, a bit sheepishly, "I think it's been since the moonshine shack, for me." 

Beth's heart feels like the sun has been encased in her ribs, burning the insides of her ribs and casting out the darkness and fear and doubt. She just stares at Daryl, keenly aware that this is the moment that everything hinges on, that everything will change after this. And yet, she doesn't feel a sense of anxiety or pressure. 

It simply feels right. 

She doesn't try to kiss him. She doesn't try to crawl in bed beside him. He's still injured, still recovering, and all that needs to be said has been. It's love. It's been love. They don't need anything else but their hands clasped and Daryl's eyes sliding shut so that he can continue to recover and Beth is a being of infinite love and light, radiant in this knowledge. 

He loves her. 

She loves him. 

They have their chance, and they're going to seize it. 

* * *

"Careful. Careful," Beth chides Merle, as he helps ease Daryl into a wheelchair. Merle, glancing over Daryl's head at her, shoots her an incredulous look. 

"He was my baby brother first, kewpie doll! If you're gonna come in here and try to tell me what to do, I suggest that you -"

"Oh, I do what, huh?" 

"I can walk," Daryl insists, cutting off their bickering and Beth rolls her eyes. 

"Daryl, you can't even stand without getting dizzy," she reminds him hotly. "Ain't no way you're gonna be walking five blocks home. Now let Merle get you in this damn chair and I'm gonna push you home. Got it?" 

Daryl looks like he'd rather make a pillow out of a porcupine, but he doesn't fight it as Merle helps him get off the bed and into the wheelchair. When Merle straightens up with his hand on his back and a dramatic groan, Daryl glares at him. Beth ignores that, turning to make sure she's grabbed everything of Daryl's from his now vacated bed. 

It's been several days since he woke up. He's being allowed to return home on the condition that he not rush his recovery. And Beth intends to be there for every last second of said recovery. So she reaches down absentmindedly and touches his shoulder, only for Daryl to reach up, take her hand, and gently presses it to his check. 

Merle makes a noise like someone has chopped him hard in the throat. 

"The... Hell!" he splutters, as both Daryl and Beth look at him, Beth's hand still resting on Daryl's scratchy, scruff covered check. Merle's eyes are bugging out of his head, staring at the two of them and adopting the expression of having been clubbed over the head.

"What?" Beth asks, though she knows exactly why Merle's reacting like this. 

"When the hell did that happen?" he questions with maniacal glee and Holly, an Alexandrian resident, looks up with a frown from where she's been inventorying medicine. 

"Beth and Daryl have been dating for awhile," she tells him, head cocked like she's trying to judge if Merle's an idiot or if his brain is just fried from too many decades of hard drug abuse. "You were the one who told us." 

"Yeah Merle," Daryl taunts, with only a hint of smugness. "You were the one who told everyone." 

"Shut your wiseass mouth," Merle warns his brother and then points to Beth. "Out with it, Thumbelina." 

"We better get Daryl home," Beth says primly, grabbing the wheelchair handles and pushing past Merle. He gives them silence until they get to the street and then he throws his head back and cackles like a damn hyena. Beth huffs, but it's better to get it out here and before they get home to the rest of their family. Beth still has some hope that maybe they'll have a few days of peace before everyone else figures it out. 

"Took you two long enough!" he cries, tears of mirth in his eyes. "Hell, I thought you'd lost your damn nerve boy, but I guess there's enough Dixon in you after all!" 

"Too much Dixon," Daryl mutters under his breath. 

"She'll have too much Dixon in her soon enough," Merle cracks and Daryl's fingers open and close like he's looking for a crossbow, but Beth places a hand on his shoulder. 

"Merle," she says sternly and Merle sobers some, apparently willing to realize he's gone a bit too far. "Quit it. We're just... Figuring things out." 

"Shit." Merle looks like he desperately wants to keep teasing them, but to Beth's surprise, he adopts a halfway serious expression. "I'm just happy for you two morons, that's all. Took you long enough. I'm over here trying to get y'all together like it's the fucking Parent Trap. Ain't right for a man to think so much about his baby brother's love life." 

"I think we both would have appreciated you staying out of it," Beth remarks dryly to Merle while Daryl simply grunts in agreement. Merle shrugs. 

"Not my fault you were moving like bugs in molasses. My way is better." he grins, looking quite satisfied in himself. "Name your firstborn after me or something. You're _welcome."_

"Absolutely not," Beth says firmly. "And keep your mouth shut to everyone else, got it?" 

"You wish, Marcia Brady." Merle smirks at her and then disappears towards the wall. Beth and Daryl watch him go before Beth glances down at Daryl. 

"I think that went well," she mutters and Daryl sighs, shaking his head very, very carefully. 

* * *

"Daryl?" Maggie looks shocked, sitting heavily on the couch. 

"Beth?" Carol leans against the counter and stares blankly at them. 

"Daryl?" Glenn looks like he's fighting not to burst into laughter; he keeps folding and unfolding his arms over his chest, like that's going to keep his amusement in. 

"Beth?" Carl looks a little heartbroken, if they're being completely honest. 

"Daryl." Rick keeps glancing between the both of them, like he's waiting for someone to reveal that this is all a big joke. 

"Beth." Michonne nods, seemingly in approval. 

"Well, shit." Merle grins at the pair of them, sitting at the counter with his arms crossed and a smug look on his face. "Glad I don't have to keep this secret no more." 

Beth and Daryl are standing in the kitchen, holding hands. It'd been easy to call a family meeting and then their announcement had consisted of Beth reaching down to entangle Daryl's fingers with hers and now they're looking defiantly at everyone, waiting for someone to say something against this, against them. So far, no one has, but everyone looks a bit startled at this revelation. 

"You knew?" Maggie demands, head whipping over to look at Merle incredulously. Even Michonne and Carol looked shocked. 

"Have to be blind not to see the way they look at each other," Merle drawls and Beth makes a face at him. "Made them do the fake dating thing. Shit, next up I was gonna steal all the beds and tell them there was only one left! Damn romance novel, my ass!" 

"Merle!" Beth looks pointedly at Judith, playing on the floor and gurgling happily. Merle rolls his eyes and waves a hand, but hushes accordingly and keeps his mouth shut while Maggie gapes at him. 

"Well, I think it's great," Glenn remarks, still evidently struggling not to laugh. "Beth and Daryl. Who would've thought?" 

"Me," Merle remarks and is rewarded with Michonne hitting his shoulder. 

"C'mon," Daryl mutters, having been put on display long enough. He pulls Beth out of the house and through Alexandria, back out to the walls and beyond them. That's where he's most comfortable. And it reminds Beth of where they began, so she follows him, hand in hand. 

"Now everyone who thought it was fake knows it's real," she remarks quietly, when they're walking through the woods and Daryl is tracking a doe. "And everyone who thought it was real has no idea that it ever was fake." 

"Never was fake," Daryl mutters, glancing back at her briefly. "Just... Different." 

"Different," Beth agrees. It wasn't fake. It's always been real feelings. 

Daryl usually only kisses her in the woods. Beth doesn't mind, because she knows how uncomfortable Alexandria makes him. 

But they're going to work on that too. 

* * *

"You did so good," Daryl mutters, stroking Beth's sweat soaked hair off her face and pressing a kiss to her forehead. Beth gives an exhausted little laugh, giddy with emotions and hormones and a whole mess of other things she can't speak on. She just looks down at the little girl in her arms in absolute wonder. 

"Can't believe she's finally here," Beth mutters in awe. It's only been nine months of anticipation, of desperate wishing and panicked thoughts about the birth. And now she's here, now she's alright. They've gotten through the labor together and are safe on the other side and they are a family of three. 

Her. Daryl. And a baby with her eyes and Daryl's nose and the smile of her aunt Maggie. 

"Can't keep them out much longer," Daryl warns her, glancing at the door and back at her with a wince. Beth chuckles, stroking back their daughter's hair carefully. Black, like her daddy's. Beth wonders if it'll stay or if it'll lighten to auburn tones. Daryl's hair is almost red in some lights. Shawn was a redhead. So was Annette. Maybe their daughter will be to, reminders of what was before. 

"Tell them they can come in," she relents and he gives her one last soft, lingering kiss before looking at their baby and shaking his head, like he can't quite believe his eyes. 

Maggie is first in. She coos, she exclaims, she points out how the little girl looks so much like Annette even though she's only a few hours old and mostly resembles an endearing, adorable blob. Glenn seconds his wife's opinion and promises to keep her cousin away until the excitable three year old Hershel learns to be gentle. 

Rick thinks she's precious. Michonne looks like she's seriously considering one. Carol says nothing but cries when she holds her. Carl agrees that she's perfect and Enid makes a joke about having baby fever that turns Carl white. 

Merle's the one who asks the most important question. 

"What's her name?" he cradles his niece and stares at her with the softest expression possible on a face like his. Beth gives Daryl a look of amusement and Daryl sighs, shaking his before he mutters, 

"Marilyn." 

"Well." Merle's mouth twitches up into a smirk. "That sounds a hell of a lot like Merle now don't it, sweet pea? You named for your uncle, huh? You named for me? Yeah, cause I'm the whole reason why you're here. I'll tell you a story when you're big enough, sunshine. I'll tell you how ol' uncle Merle brought you into the world." 

"You won't be telling her anything," Beth says firmly and when Merle tosses a shit-eating grin at her, she's too tired and happy to scold him for anything else. 

"Merle and Marilyn," he whispers to the tiny baby, a look of fierce love on his face. "We're gonna raise so much hell." 

Beth doesn't bother to correct him. She leans against Daryl, feels his lips press against her skull, feels his arms around, and hears the oddly tender sounds of Merle Dixon telling tall tales to Marilyn Dixon.

Because of her uncle, indeed. 

**Author's Note:**

> i am obsessed with merle dixon someone plz send help
> 
> i just love this dixon idiots 
> 
> IMAGINE. WE COULD HAVE HAD IT ALL.


End file.
